I have a lot of high expectations for myself. There are lot of things I want to do, goals I want to achieve, and routines I want to create and maintain. I could offer a whole bunch of reasons as to why I’m not meeting my goals, but they would be excuses. I need to move past my excuses. I need to recognize my shortcomings so that I can make changes towards the direction I really do want to take.
A year ago, I was excited to begin personal training and I had a fitness goal. While I exercised intermittently throughout the year, I have not been on any kind of regiment. Needless to say, I hold a certification for personal training but am doing absolutely nothing with it. My fitness goals have been empty. Working 40-65 hours/week (not including commute time) has left me drained so I cancelled my (overpriced) gym membership. Because of my poor habits, I have actually increased my body fat percentage in the last four-six months. I have tossed around the idea of indoor rockwall climbing because I would absolutely LOVE to do it. Unfortunately, it’s 10 miles away from where I live and 30 miles away from where I will start working in August. Near my future job is a boxing/kick-boxing gym that I would love to check out/join…in August. In the meantime, I want to develop some kind of exercise habit either at home or at the rockwall climbing place (just really anything more than my weekly jog).
I wanted to keep up with my blog at least on a monthly basis. Ideally, I would like to post more, but I feel like I don’t have a whole lot to post about. I do have a lot of stories that I would like to share about Korea but those posts are actually hard to write. They are hard because it makes me miss Korea (even though I doubt I will ever want to actually LIVE there again–travel there? yes). They also make me realize how much I don’t like living in my current city.
To be honest, I never planned on staying in Texas more than a few months. My ‘few months’ has turned into a year and a half. I’m itching to move but I plan on staying here another two years. I swear though, after those two years…something drastic would have to change to keep me here. Get me out of here!
I have been meaning to finish/polish out a short story that I had started for one of my writing classes. I also have a fantasy novel that I began that could use a middle and an ending. I also have a REALLY GOOD story idea that I would to write and possibly publish. Want to know the sad thing? I have bought several books on writing and have yet to read them. I know that I need to just force myself to write, possibly daily, or those stories will never get finished.
Blah. This post is nothing more than “I wanted to” and “My goal is to” and none of these goals are new; they are just proven empty promises that I seem to continuously make to myself.
I refuse to keep setting myself up for failure; I know I can do these things. I have to stop letting excuses get in the way.