The first couple of months I came back to the United States were the hardest. I struggled to find normalcy in my life. My life had completely changed:
- I went from a full-time job to having no job.
- I went from interacting with people in Korean on a daily basis to not hearing Korean at all.
- I went from speaking minimal English to having listen and speak it everyday–and often from people that spoke loudly.
- I went from living independently (for over 10 years) to moving in with my mom.
- My diet completely changed; my favorite Korean foods were no longer an easy (nor cheap) option.
- I went from sleeping on blankets on the floor to an air mattress.
The list goes on…there was only one thing that was the same: walking my dog. I found myself walking my dog frequently to escape the house, to try to forget that my life was no longer the same. I preferred to walk late at night when it was dark outside..it reminded me of my late night walks (with and without Sue) in Korea. Sometimes my thoughts would go in a downward spiral about everything I had lost and given up by coming back to America. To be honest, I would spend most of these walks in tears. It took me months to get over the pangs of what I had lost….but that’s a post for another day.
Anyone else have a similar feeling of loss when they returned to their home country?