Well, I just realized that 2010 is almost over. I know there are still a few more days left, but I don’t foresee anything monumental happening in the next 3 days. I also haven’t had this blog for a full year either. Anyway, enough with semantics.
I’ve been on my quest for ‘happiness’ for a few years now. “Searching for Happiness” was actually my name on my myspace account (which I no longer have) back in 2008. Two years have come and gone since then–crazy. Well, back in 2008 I was in a job/living situation that made me feel utterly alone and unhappy. I literally dreaded work 90% of the time. I remember the days when I was going to work and trying not to cry. Two reasons for this: (1) I hate crying and (2) it was the knowledge that I would have to drag myself through yet another painful day of work. This is when I started my search for happiness.
I decided a change of scenery might cheer me up. I was fortunate and landed another job away from my prior job. Although my life improved (I no longer hated work), I knew I wasn’t happy. I needed to get out of the country. I needed to escape the place where my friends were superficial and few and far between. I needed to find a new direction in my life. So, I jumped at the opportunity to work in Korea.
Now I’m in Korea. Many of things about my life have changed; it’s definitely a new experience. I love experiencing the culture here and I enjoy the struggle of learning the language. Korea is also an awesome place to shop and to visit historic sites. The public transportation system is typically amazing (granted with a few inconveniences but it’s VASTLY better than in the states). I now have different circles of friends and I go out every weekend. I drink and go to clubs way more than I ever did in the states (which is pretty easy to do considering I rarely if ever went out). I eat food I’ve never eaten before (and I enjoy most of it). I also eat more vegetables. (No I don’t eat a lot of vegetables–in fact I still don’t like them; it’s just way more than my old once-a-week-if-that intake I had in the states). In many ways, things are a lot better and I feel happier as a whole.
Some things never change though. I realize that although the people I hang out with here are awesome and I have blast hanging out with them–my time with them is limited to Korea. I doubt that I’ll see them when the contract ends, but that’s okay. I know that if we do meet up later in life, we’ll still go out for another round of drinks and have a great time. Also, the type of work I’m doing is not much different: I’m still teaching (granted in a slightly different way). I still feel that a lot of what I do in the classroom really doesn’t matter…actually I might feel that more-so here. Living alone is nothing new. I still eat like crap: junk food, meat, and ramen all the way! So in a lot of ways I’m still at square one.
In fact, I was hoping to come to Korea to have time to figure out what it is I want to do with my life. I am still working towards the general direction of foreign affairs. However, my exact steps towards this goal are not defined as of yet. All I know is that it’s probably too late to apply for grad school (seeing as the deadline is in 2 weeks and I still don’t have a Statement of Purpose written). Therefore, I still need to figure out with I’m going to do in the meantime. I’m leaning towards staying another year in Korea, but I’m also open to other countries. I don’t think I’m ready to go back to the states; in fact I know I’m not.
I guess, to sum it all up: my New Years Resolution for 2011 is to really sit down with myself and figure out–where next?